I Am Tired of Thyroid Eye Disease

I am tired.

Deep down in my bones and in my heart, I am tired.

I am tired of thinking about my eyes multiple times a day.

I am tired of looking different.

I am tired of remembering the person I was, seeing photos of her, and wondering who she would be today if thyroid eye disease (TED) had never forced itself upon her.

I am tired of waking up in the mornings with my eyes painfully dry.

I am tired of eye drops three times a day.

I am tired of how different my glasses look on me.

I am tired of feeling self-conscious in photos and videos.

I am tired of being scared.

I am tired of analyzing my face in the mirror and wondering, full of fear if my symptoms will someday return.

I’m tired of other people comparing my severe and traumatic autoimmune disease that required multiple surgeries to common, more manageable health conditions.

I am tired of wondering what would have happened if XYZ had gone differently.

I am tired of strangers outside of the TED community commenting on my eyes.

I am tired of explaining how much TED impacts my daily life.

I am tired of people saying that everything will be okay.

I am tired of there being so few treatment options.

I am tired of waiting to see what will happen.

I am tired of feeling like I’m in a constant state of adjustment.

I am tired of wondering.

I am tired of feeling sad.

I am tired of hurting.

I am tired of thyroid eye disease, however...

I’m thankful for the TED, chronic illness, and thyroideyedisease.net communities. I’m glad that my advocacy has helped many people. I’m grateful for the messages I receive from others with TED. I don’t know where I would be without my supportive family and wonderful, caring team of doctors.

I just truly wish that things were easier for all of us.

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