Wearing Makeup Again

I have not worn makeup consistently in over 5 years. I was not that much of a makeup girl to begin with. So in the transition from no-thyroid eye disease (TED) to TED, when it came to makeup with sensitive and swollen eyes, it was nonexistent for me. I did not think about makeup for years.

I bought makeup once for my friend’s bachelorette weekend last year. Mascara, concealer, the bare minimum I could get away with. If I have to wear makeup, I like to at least look like I am not wearing it. Looking more put together with the aura of having not done anything at all to achieve this look.

Wearing minimal makeup for 1 weekend was an experiment for me. I noticed I could feel the difference in my eyes while wearing mascara but it did not bother me the way I had anticipated. It had been about a year since I had any active TED symptoms at that point.

Revisiting old makeup techniques with thyroid eye disease

I felt pretty good after that weekend, that wearing makeup to my cousin's wedding a few months later was not an issue at all. I wore the same products, concealer, and mascara. Looking presentable for a dressed-up occasion was good enough for me. But now I am going to be the maid-of-honor at my sister’s wedding and I am thinking about makeup in a whole new way.

All the makeup from the bachelorette weekend had expired. I had to buy all new products. Mascara, concealer, and this time, wet eyeliner. I have not put on eyeliner in such a long time, this was the part I was more curious/nervous about. How would it feel to put eyeliner on? How would it be different than the last time I wore it?

I started by wearing mascara and concealer for a few days before testing out the wet eyeliner. Whenever I put on mascara, I immediately notice a different feeling. Any type of change brings awareness around my eyes. Again, because they are not sensitive or fragile like they used to be, my eyes are not bothered by the change.

Noticeable changes wearing makeup with TED: Wet eyeliner

The first thing I notice about wearing eyeliner for the first time on my eyelids is how my eyelids have changed because of TED. They are a different shape. The eyelid fold has completely changed. The way it comes in contact with my eyebrow bone has changed. The eyelid and eyebrow bone touch more than they did before. There is a difference between both of my eyelids, too. They are more different now than they were pre-TED.

I apply the wet eyeliner with slow, steady, and cautious concentration. I do not want to poke myself in the eye. I do not want to make them mad. It is not the best winged eyeliner, but it looks better than I ever did when I went through a winged eyeliner phase when I was younger.

Throughout the day, I can feel the eyeliner in my eyes. It is not a bad feeling. I am just acutely aware of the differences. At the end of the day, I notice my makeup has almost all smudged off on one of my eyes because of the way my eye fold hits my eyebrow bone. But my eyes did not tear up once, which I take as a win for wearing makeup for the first time in 5 years.

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